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Procrastinator007
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Mr. Malcolm's List (2022)
A time-passer with boring leads
The plot was predictable, but I expected that. The bigger problem was that the two leads have 0 chemistry and their characters are boring. For one, I don't understand why all female characters are obsessed with Mr. Malcolm. He's arrogant and dull, without any charm. He lacks tact completely, as well.
I much preferred the romance between the secondary characters, Julia and Henry. Sure, Julia was a sucky person at times, but she at least had a distinct personality. Henry was also much more charming than Mr. Malcolm and I enjoyed their banters as well as their romantic moments.
Even Julia's cousin had more character than Mr. Malcolm.
Basically, it's an ok movie to pass the time and let your brain rest. You know what to expect from the get-go so there's not much thinking required. I recommend fast-forwarding the scenes containing just the two leads because they take forever and are quite boring.
Posljednji Srbin u Hrvatskoj (2019)
Generally, don't bother.
If you're not from one of the countries of ex- Yugoslavia, you will most likely not understand 99% of the jokes and references, so don't bother watching this movie. If you are, you will understand everything, but it won't be funny because it's too on the nose, not subtle at all and poorly presented, so don't bother watching this movie.
I hoped the movie wouldn't be typically Croatian, but unfortunately it ended up being just that: bad writing, thinks it's mocking stereotypes, but is actually perpetuating them, thinks the audience is stupid so everything needs to be drawn to them (explicit jokes so that you absolutely must understand that the character is making a joke), swearing left and right etc. Wouldn't hurt to also find some Serbian actors to play the actual Serbs instead of having Croatian actors speak with a sort of Bosnian accent, I guess?
The biggest "offense", if I can call it that, is that the movie spent an hour and 20 minutes to build itself up as inclusive, border-breaking or something only to completely destroy itself in the last 10 minutes by introducing a race of "Neo Serbs", who are presented as worse than zombies, violent, merciless and radical. Like, what was the point of the movie? Seriously, what was it? I don't get it and I don't think the movie gets it either.
The movie also included some of the most prominent contemporary Croatian actors. If you didn't know their faces, you would never be able to tell that they are actually good actors. I don't know who should be blamed for this, though.
Yeah, so, generally - don't bother.
Mr. Monk's Last Case: A Monk Movie (2023)
Feels like any higher grade is nostalgia talking
I haven't watched the show. I understand it's one of those shows with a cult following and it seems like the creators of this movie not only understood it as well, but exploited it to the fullest because the movie, on its own, is weak and borderline a waste of time. I liked Monk's character and backstory, and the ending was emotional and well done, but that's about it.
For one, the antagonist is an absolute idiot. And I don't mean it as an offense, but as a fact. He's just, simply, stupid. He does stupid things in a stupid way with stupid motivation and an utterly stupid plan. An idiot. And the creators seem to think the audience is, as well. Why else would they have a perp randomly give the crucial hint about the murder right after the murder, at the place of the murder, the thing nobody could possibly know at the time, and say it completely unnecessarily and unwarranted? Why else would they have the villain send the threatening letters written by hand, touched with his own hands and with his saliva on the envelope in a time where fingerprints and DNA are usable in crime investigations? Why? This makes me so angry, seriously 😒
Also, it is said that if the audience knows who did it, at least the "how" should remain a mistery. The thing is, even the "how" is super obvious from the start. To everyone, apparently, but the brilliant detective and his entourage of useless, obviously-only-there-to-cash-in-on-nostalgia side characters. I'm not saying the characters aren't likeable or occasionally funny even, but they're completey irrelevant to anything that's happening.
Ah, I know I might be unnecessarily upset, but I'm angry at myself for thinking a high grade reflects the quality :(
Also, Monk's condition occasionally seems to only be there to make fun of it? Like when he brought his own sanitizer machine to the court room and then didn't allow anyone else to use it. Why not just bring sanitizer in a bottle? *sigh*
Élite (2018)
Overall, great, but I have a problem with the script.
I binge watched this show on Netflix. It hooks you from the first episode and keeps your interest right until the very last episode. The actors are young, but it feels like they've been doing that job for ages. I also like the way the story is told, switching from the interrogation scenes to the scenes which led to the murder. I also feel like this show deals with many difficult topics in an excellent way, things like islamophobia, homophobia, patriarchy and the great wide hole between the rich and the poor, like the characters actually try to find the way to overcome all these things.
There's only one thing I have a problem with, and that is Marina's character. I can't help feeling like she really is the one at fault for being murdered. Or, okay, maybe not being murdered, but for putting herself in danger. She just. Can't. Keep. Her mouth. Shut. She can't keep a secret. She ruined literally everybody's lives, and her own, beacuse of this. You don't just go and tell people you know who the blackmailer is. You don't just go and tell Carla you have her watch. It's just.... idiotic behaviour.
So, yeah, I have a bit of a problem with that part of the script. I feel like maybe the showmakers didn't know how else to introduce certain plot points so quickly other than having Marina (and also Samuel!) tell stuff that no normal person would. Maybe they were pressed for duration of the show and didn't have time to have characters find out about these things in other ways, like the identity of the blackmailers or the location of the watch or, anything else, like when Samuel screamed in front of the whole class that Marina was pregnant (WHAT EVEN!) or he just HAD to text about her HIV situation during class, knowing full well that he could get in trouble for using a mobile phone in class. I mean couldn't he wait literally half an hour max to text Omar? Or just tell him in person. Stupid.
Assassin's Creed (2016)
Really enjoyed it!
Call me a sucker for hooded figures, but I really enjoyed this movie!
I haven't played the games yet, so I didn't have any preconceptions about what the story should contain. I heard it didn't get very positive reviews, though, but I didn't believe a movie starring the actors it does could be THAT bad. And it really isn't.
I liked the story, too. It's easy to follow, it keeps you engaged and it's packed with action. The fight scenes are well done, the high jumps and the dives made my heart rush, but then again, I'm a sucker for those, too.
The reason I gave it a 9 and not a 10 is because there were several moments where CGI was way too pronounced and I don't like when that happens. I like it when it blends in nicely.