The Impostors (1998)
David Lipman: Baker
Quotes
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Maurice : [has just finished eating a pastry; part of a scheme to get free pastries] I hate them.
Baker in Kramer's Pastries : Oh, I'm sorry; to each his own. There's another bakery shop down the block whose wares might be more to your liking. Thank you for coming in.
[to Arthur]
Baker in Kramer's Pastries : May I help you, sir?
Arthur : Yes, would you excuse me a moment? I'm sorry,
[to Maurice]
Arthur : I couldn't help but overhear, excuse me, sir, um, but may I say that your rudeness to this hard-working gentleman is uncalled for.
Baker in Kramer's Pastries : Please, sir
Maurice : I beg your pardon.
Arthur : No, I beg yours, sir. I happen to know that this gentleman
[refers to the baker]
Arthur : is one of the finest pastry chefs on the Eastern seaboard.
Baker in Kramer's Pastries : Well, thank you.
Arthur : You're welcome.
Baker in Kramer's Pastries : Do I know you?
Arthur : Of course you do.
Maurice : What's your point?
Arthur : My point is, sir, that you would not know a good creampuff if it jumped up and licked you on the ass.
Maurice : Well...
Baker in Kramer's Pastries : Sir, it's just a difference in taste.
Arthur : No, no. this man is clearly an imbecile.
Maurice : Ah, an insult!
[quietly to Arthur]
Maurice : I'm in-I'm insulted?
Arthur : Yes.
Maurice : I'm insulted! Well, I am!
Arthur : Oh, well good-good-good-good! Well, I'm glad you are! But I'm sure you're not as insulted as this gentleman!
Baker in Kramer's Pastries : Oh, I'm not insulted.
Arthur : Oh, yes you are! The man works all day like a mule to support his miserable family.
Baker in Kramer's Pastries : Well, here now, my family isn't miserable. We're all quite happy!
Arthur : No, you're not! You're miserable and pathetic, look at you!
[ignoring his protest]
Arthur : All day, working like a lackey from rise to set sweating in the eye of Phoebus!
Baker in Kramer's Pastries : I love my work!
Arthur : No, you don't!
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Arthur : What a fool you are!
Baker in Kramer's Pastries : I am *not* a fool!
Arthur : Oh, yes you are!
Maurice : Sir, you really sholdn't talk to this gentleman that way. You like the cream puffs. I *don't* like the cream puffs.
Arthur : FUCK THE CREAM PUFFS! THIS MAN IS A SLAVE AND AN IDIOT!